So, yes. I overthink a lot. A lot. There's a fine line between not putting enough thought into something and overthinking it. I often can't seem to find the line. I'm pretty sure it's written in invisible ink where I'm concerned.
Today, I want to talk about overthinking things when it comes to my writing (but is it really overthinking?).
I have an idea for a story. Actually, I have two ideas for two stories right now and I'm just not sure how to write either of them. I think they're great ideas (there I go thinking again). They're both different than anything I've ever done before. One of them, I feel like it's sort of the story that I'm supposed to write. It's going to be a challenge but it's one that I have to take on because this book will pretty much be the book of my heart.
But that's where the trouble comes in. There are so many variables in life and also in the publishing industry. So many things to consider, not only in telling the story in the best way I can, but also in timing, and the industry. Yes, I know what you're thinking. Just write. And while I agree with that and I'll always be true to myself and my voice, for me personally, it doesn't work for me to not consider ALL THE THINGS before writing a book.
I'm not one of those kind of writers who can piece together a story out of order or just write knowing that it's not working the way it's being written. I am a planner, and a control freak in some ways, and there are certain things I have to have figured out from the start or I drive myself crazy with "what if" and "What about?" and any other way I can find to question myself.
I'm sure it's especially frustrating to my friends because I'm also a talker. It helps me to talk things out, even when I know the other person can't tell me what to do. It helps me work through things in my head.
So, for over two months I've had this story in my head that I know I have to tell. I have to, but considering I'm only at 3,000 words, I have this fear that I'm not going to be able to do it. Or that I'm going to do it wrong. That I'm not going to do this story justice and that scares the crap out of me.
What if it's the wrong time? What if people don't want to read books about *insert plot point here*? What if I choose the wrong POV? Those are all the thoughts that I can't get to quiet down enough for me to figure this book out. It's driving me crazy. Seriously.
It's scary for a planning, control freak like me to never know what to do in regards to my career. When I worked in the hospital, I knew what to do. I had a set job and someone to tell me how to do it. It's different here because words and stories and books are so subjective. Which, I guess means there is never a clear right or wrong answer and sometimes (like now!) that's hard for me to swallow.
But I will keep going. I'll figure it out eventually.
Are you an over thinker? Do you need everything figured out from the start, or is it easier for you to just kind of let things go and see what happens? Is it even considered overthinking to be this obsessed about the topic at hand? I'm not sure on that...